New idea for a series, no idea if it will work or not, but I’m curious and for now, strangely motivated.
My sister and I are in the process of emptying my mother’s house so we can get it on to the market. – the joys of needing to pay nursing home fees. Clearing out the wardrobe in my old room, I found various items I’d meant to move out with me, but due to lack of space in abodes prior to living chez TGG, had left behind. Among them, football & speedway programmes, a backgammon set and every issue of Smash Hits magazine from August 1979 to April 1983. The latter date was the moment when I realised that my sister (who is five years younger than me) was reading it more than I was.
This realisation was caused by the nature of the music covered changing and the fact that I myself was changing. I was 13 when this run of purchases began, and I stopped just a month before my 17th birthday. I was also picking up NME, Sounds, Melody Maker and Record Mirror on a more occasional basis, with NME and RM becoming regular purchases once I ditched Smash Hits.
I should point out that I’ve lived at my current address since 1997, and could have moved these items at any time. Mrs TGG hasn’t even noticed their arrival (at least I don’t think she has).
I plan to saunter through each magazine with a brief-ish description of the contents, commenting on anything that interests me and providing a link or two to tunes of interest. All the magazines are in a reasonable state, apart from the well-thumbed first one, which has also had the misfortune of being top of the pile and acting a a protector for the others below.
This was actually the 18th issue of the magazine. I’d been tempted by earlier issues, but the thing that got the purchase over the line was the inclusion on the inside cover of the words to Beat The Clock by Sparks. The publication of song lyrics was the big attraction of Smash Hits – in theory settling the various arguments about what was actually being sung. Except that they didn’t always get it right. A letter in this issue berates them for printing “curry and kippers for breakfast” as opposed to “could we have kippers for breakfast” a couple of issues previously when including the lyrics for Supertramp’s Breakfast In America.
So the 13 year-old me was thrilled to read those Sparks lyrics and was word perfect in no time. I still know them off by heart. I can also see why they haven’t played it live since 2013, as the words do include a degree of misogyny that seemed to be more accepted back in 1979, but is actually quite cringeworthy when you stop and consider it.
So what else was there? Words for Gangsters by The Specials and Is She Really Going Out With Him by Joe Jackson follow – a couple of classic tunes and the first hit for both. Then it’s ELO and one of theirs that you don’t hear so often these days, despite a Top 10 placing – The Diary Of Horace Wimp.
Below ELO is an advert for Boots announcing that they’ve cut the price for singles to 79p. I remember reading that and thinking it was still too expensive and that I could save myself money by not getting the bus into town and getting my records more cheaply from my local shop, which was within walking distance. It’s also got me wondering as to exactly when it was that Boots stopped selling records.
3 pages of short items follow under the heading of Bitz. Rita Ray of Darts shares her All Time Top 10. It includes two from both Mary Wells and Smokey Robinson. Bitz also has a short feature on a new mod band, The Merton Parkas, one of whom will go on to have a lot of hits in the 80s as part of The Style Council – Mick Talbot.
There’s then an interview with cover star, Ian Dury, and the words to his latest release, Reasons To Be Cheerful, Part 3. Quite handy given the “list” nature of the song.
Three sets of lyrics on the next page: Ooh! What A Life by The Gibson Brothers, You Never Know What You’ve Got by Me And You (looked it up – got to #31) and a band also mentioned in Bitz, with a cover whose words were probably quite well-known to most readers (or at least their parents):
This was the future! Except that it wasn’t. Better synth records were already out and about and despite their TOTP appearance, the Belgians fared even less well than Me And You, peaking at #34.
Two pages of Disco follow with lyrics to Boogie Down (Get Funky Now) by The Real Thing and Earth, Wind & Fire’s After The Love Has Gone. Not sure how Disco the latter of those is – more of a Smooth Radio staple I’d say (the people at my mother’s nursing home have Smooth playing in her room all the time as she likes to sing along – you get to know what they play).
Centre photo is The Boomtown Rats (who were the current No 1 with I Don’t Like Mondays). The future Sir Bob – pulling at a roll of cellophane with his mouth because….. Wacky! Rock And Roll! etc.
Then there’s an interview with The Pretenders headed “Stop Your Gobbing” – they didn’t like audiences spitting at them apparently, particularly Pete Farndon.
Future No 1 for Cliff, We Don’t Talk Anymore shares a page with Dire Straits non-hit “Lady Writer”, before a Sham 69 interview and the words for Hersham Boys.
Then it’s some pretty unremarkable Singles & Albums reviews. The Sex Pistols’ Some Product merits 9/10, with Neil Youngs’s Rust Never Sleeps getting 8/10. (I know which of those I’ve listened to more over the years). An album also scoring 8/10 that I’ve never listened to is the Nina Hagen Band’s eponymous effort, with this track being described as “just incredible”:
That’s one word for it.
Skipping past the Letters and Word Searches, we get a Request lyric for Stiff Little Fingers and the previous year’s Alternative Ulster, which I’m guessing was released prior to the first issue of Smash Hits.
There’s an eclectic list of gigs, with the most intriguing taking place on 21st August at Hammersmith Palais, featuring the varied talents of The Specials, Linton Kwesi Johnson and John Cooper Clarke.
We round off the lyrics with a couple that hark back to another era – Darts’ cover of Duke Of Earl and the cast of thousands that was Showaddywaddy and the long-forgotten Sweet Little Rock’n’Roller, and then there’s a photo of David Bowie on the back cover, with D.J. having recently just made it into the Top 30.
I enjoyed writing that and had no idea which songs I was going to feature when I started. I guess that means I’ll at least do the following issue at some point. I hope that you enjoyed being catapulted back in time.
TGG
2 responses to “Smash Hits: August 9-22 1979”
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It’s genuinely fascinating to realise that these early editions of Smash Hits covered such a broad range of music. It’s not a magazine I ever bought but then again – it was 1979, the year when I got to my first live gig, that I began to buy music papers. I wasn’t faithful to any of the inkies – I’d look at each front page, and based on who was featured in the cover photo or the undercard, would decide which I’d go for that week.
I think this is great idea for a regular feature.
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Thanks for the kind words about the series. I think the nature of the early Smash Hits was a product of the times, where the Top 40 contained a mix of (in my mind) new pop and rock acts, old pop and rock acts, disco and stuff my parents liked. There were little in the way of “pin-up” acts, save for the cover stars of the next issue and it was very much about the music. It changed at some point – if I stick with this long enough, we may all find out when!
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Wasting time in the study 
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